On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Randomize
