That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize