Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
