was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Are we still banned from the library?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize