some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
the condom got lost in my hair
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Everything about him screamed your future.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
false alarm, still single
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
