Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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