She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
