No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize