Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
