I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
