i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
How's work?
Spinning.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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