just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize