so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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