she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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