No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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