I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
