Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(416): View more from Ontario

No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town

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(919): View more from North Carolina

You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.

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(253): View more from Washington

sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...

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(815): View more from Illinois

Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."

(1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

Figured I'd get right to the point

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness

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(512): View more from Texas

Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?

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(732): View more from New Jersey

What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.

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