Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
I don't think brook has ever known best
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
