Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
