doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
