SEEEEXXX PLEASE
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
