i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
This house was built for laser tag.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
i believe in u and ur pee
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
