I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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