I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
