I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
