idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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