What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
