Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Randomize
