Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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