if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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