The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
