when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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