I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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