this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize
