I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
