He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
