WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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