i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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