She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize