I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Randomize
