ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
