Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
