my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
