We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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