Do you still have your period?
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
