okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
