only you would photoshop your dick
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
