Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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