this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
