New invention idea: vibrating tampons
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
