The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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